Well yesterday I was at a prayer retreat. I had lots of questions but one of my main questions isn't just for God it's also for any one who can answer it! I have even asked Rickey, who can't even answer it.
I like to think that I treat Rickey the way I would want to be treated if I suffered this illness. So my question, where is the line? You know the line to know when to push him and get him out of his rut and that time when I need to step back and give him his space. If you ask him in a moment of low he will tell you to leave him alone and don't worry about it.
I do worry! We were going to go to a friends church this morning but with the anxiety his is having now, he doesn't want to be around people. When do I push? I am not used to this person and people try to understand but they can't wrap their minds around it either.
I do need to say that after last nights post, R said "it sounds like your life sucks right now". Well yes it kinda does but I also want you all to know, I love our sweet moments and I am still married to my best friend and I wouldn't want to go through this with ANY one else. I know has a awesome reason and I may not understand and I also know there are people losing their spouses to death, I am thankful I still have my husband. I don't want anyone to think that our life stinks all the time. I just tend to get all the nasty stuff out on my blog, it's like my public diary. Just saying!
So anyway, I am learning to accept some of this and I think it helps me keep my sanity.
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